Patrick’s Confession (23)

Let who will laugh and scoff. I will not be silent, nor will I conceal the signs and wonders which the Lord has shown me many years before they happened – He Who knows all happenings since before the beginning of time.

That is why I should give thanks to God without ceasing – because He has often been lenient with my foolishness and my carelessness. And because on more than one occasion He has not been wrathful with me, who was given to Him as a helper but did not quickly accept the task which was made clear to me nor do as the Spirit prompted. And the Lord took pity on me countless times, because He saw that I was ready, but that I did not know how to organize myself for these matters. For there were many who hindered this mission. They even talked among themselves behind my back, saying, “Who is this fellow going into danger among enemies who do not know God?”

This was not from malic, but because they didn’t like the look of it – I bear witness to that myself – and you may take it that it was because of my naïveté. And I was not aware of the grace which was within me. Now I know that I should have understood this earlier.

Now, then: I have given a simple explanation to those of my brothers and fellow servants who believed in me because of what I preached – and continue to preach – for the strengthening and confirming of your faith. If only you too could be persuaded to do better! This will be my renown; for “it is the son’s wisdom that gives honour to the father.”

Translation Liam De Paor, St. Patrick’s World 

From this section it seems Patrick delayed somewhat in making his way to Ireland in obedience to the Lord’s vision. God was calling him, but apparently it took Patrick a while to get moving, and that for three reasons.

First, those with whom he shared his vision and burden seem to have discouraged such an idea. They could not imagine him, an unlearned and untrained lay person, taking up so dangerous a calling among the wild pagan peoples of Ireland. Their question, “Who is this fellow going into danger among enemies who do not know God?”, tells us much about the state of Church leadership in Britain in the middle of the 5^th century, a condition loudly decried by Gildas in The Ruin of Britain a few years after the turn of the 6^th century. Patrick knew that Christ had come among his enemies (Rom. 5.10) for the purpose of bringing the Kingdom and salvation. Why he not do likewise?

Second, and perhaps because of this discouragement, Patrick himself appears to have had some difficulty realizing that he had the grace of God to take up this calling. He was naïve in all such matters and did not perceive that God’s grace could fit one such as he for something he’d never done, nor even imagined, before. But the nagging prompts of the Spirit kept the vision alive until Patrick was finally determined to go.

Finally, once he did determine to go, he was hindered by his lack of practical skill in getting organized. How does one prepare for something he has never undertaken before, especially when no one who might help him seemed the least inclined to do so?

But he praised the Lord for bearing with him through this dithering, and for continuing to prompt him by the Spirit to follow the vision he had received. The “signs and wonders” he was shown beforehand may refer to his vision of ministering among the Irish – an impossible task, it would seem, but one which God allowed him to fulfill. God bore with him, took pity on him, and continued gently to prompt and persuade him in the direction of his appointed mission.

Patrick took up his calling – in spite of opposition, ignorance, and self-doubt – and God confirmed his obedient faith with a fruitful ministry. What Patrick learned through this process he proclaimed to those entrusted to his care: Hear the Lord! Obey the Lord! Believe great things from the Lord! Go beyond yourself and your experiences and limitations, for the Lord’s grace is sufficient to enable you to fulfill whatever He calls you to do!”

Thus Patrick urged his hearers to believe the Gospel and “to do better” than they or he had ever dared to ask or think. We need not stumble at Patrick’s desire to be remembered. The legacy he sought, after all, was that of faithful disciples who were going beyond him in every respect.

Looking out from heaven in the centuries that followed, Patrick must have been pleased.

Want to learn more about Patrick and the impact of his ministry? Order T. M.’s book, The Legacy of Patrick, from our online store.